In the Name of Education
by slantedwonders
Summary: Over the years Jim Kirk has had many encounters with teachers. Some good, some bad, some he'll never live down and others he'll never talk about. 5 plus 1 fic.
1. Chapter 1

_Author's Notes_: This is a response to a prompt on the Star Trek Kink Meme. The prompt was "5 teachers Jim Kirk banged and the one that banged him." I cheated a few times by manipulating the meaning of the word "banged." I'm just evil like that. Each part will be posted seperately, as that's how I posted them on the Meme.

For this particular part I would like to say: Jim is 18. There is sex of the Kirk/OFC-I-will-never-use-again variety. It is not explicit by my standards, but could be for some. Be careful. Consider that your warning.

_Pairings_: Kirk/OFC, Kirk/Pike (sort of), Kirk/Spock

_Rating_: M for sexual themes and language

_Disclaimer_: I own nothing. Not a thing. Not even the inspiration for this fic as it came from the Kink Meme. I am not making money off of this. Please don't sue. (Because all I'd be able to give you is my cell phone, a dodgy laptop, and my battered copy of Sherlock Holmes.)

* * *

**In the Name of Education**

1. Jim Kirk learns that sex can fix all his problems.

It's one month before graduation and the principal is being a dick. Jim knows he can be a royal pain in the ass, but he just doesn't think it's right that the principal is actually trying to find a reason not to let him graduate. He's already not letting him walk and Jim didn't even start that fight! How was he supposed to know that girl had a boyfriend? How was he supposed to know he went to school with the guy? The guy just came up to him and clocked him in the middle of the cafeteria. How was that his fault?

Well, Jim and his mother had tried just about everything to get the principal to let him walk, but the son of a bitch wouldn't have it. So, Jim went home to a very disappointed mother every day and had no idea how to make it better. At least he was still getting his diploma.

Jim works part time at a bar and grill. It doesn't pay much, but at least once a week he finds someone to go home with. It's one of those slow nights when he sees someone familiar at the bar. It's his guidance counselor (which is a very strange experience). She'd tried her best to get the principal to cave, but the asshole wouldn't budge. The least he can do is talk to her, since she's sitting all by her lonesome. Jim notices two things during his conversation with her: she's gorgeous and she's completely hammered.

Jim (because he's a good kid and not because she's gorgeous and not because his bike totally died on him yesterday) offers to drive her home. It's surprisingly easy to get her to agree and she turns over her keys. It's the least he can do, right?

They fuck in the backseat. Jim doesn't know how she's coherent enough to push him against the passenger's side door, straddle him, and take her panties off over her heels. Jim is certain he couldn't have done that sober. He doesn't really care how when she unbuttons his slacks. They're still mostly clothed and Jim really hates dress pants and the way they stick to his thighs when he thrusts upwards. If it didn't feel so goddamn good (and if he didn't have to wear them again) he'd have ripped the fucking things off. It's not the best sex. She's drunk and comes minutes before Jim is anywhere near thinking about orgasms, but he keeps going until they're both gasping for breath.

It takes five minutes for Jim to realize that he's extremely uncomfortable. His head is at a strange angle, the lock is pressed awkwardly into his neck, his left shoe is currently MIA and his right leg is hooked, somewhat strangely, around the driver's seat. They climb out of the car after they've righted their clothing, searched for and finally found Jim's shoe, and he walks her to the door (it's the least he can do). He catches a bus home.

Three days later he gets a letter in homeroom informing him that not only will he be getting his diploma and walking in the ceremony, but there's nothing anyone can do to stop him. It's signed by the principal and his guidance counselor. When Jim shows it to his mother she says, "I always knew she was a good woman." He replies, "Oh, yeah, she's great." He never explains the double entendre.


	2. Chapter 2

_Author's Notes:_ Ah! Chapter 2! I quite like the girl in this one and I want to use her in another fic as a non-love interest character... I may give her a sister. Anyway, this part is...well pretty much like the first part. There is some good Jim-Bones friendship at the end though.

Again, the sex is not explicit. Not by my standards. But be wise, it could be by yours. You are warned.

_Pairing:_ Kirk/OFC, Kirk/Pike (sort of), Kirk/Spock (That part contains Kirk/OFC-that-I-may-use-again-because-I-think-she's-kinda-cool...she is also that last of the OFCs)

_Rating:_ M for sexual situations and language

_Disclaimer:_ I own nothing! Not a thing! I am not making money off of this! And if you think I am, then you've seriously miscalculated my talent.

* * *

2. Jim learns the finer points of Andorian birthday rituals and what it's like to be used.

He doesn't really need help with his Cultures of the Universe class and he's certain his tutor knows this, but she still plays along. Jim thinks that may be one of the reasons he wants her so badly. She's well aware of the game he's playing and she's willing to play along. The only problem is he doesn't know if he should just make the first move or wait for her. Women (and aliens) can be tricky like that. Tonight they're supposed to be going over the steps in the Andorian birthday ritual.

This girl is beautiful. She's the reason Jim signed up for a tutor in the first place. Ultimately, it took bombing three quizzes and failing a couple tests to get her attention, but it was worth it. He can't remember what planet she said she was from, but he wants to write them and thank them for sending her to Starfleet Academy. She's tall and muscular with cat-like green-yellow eyes. But it's her scales that really get Jim. They're a pale green and he's fascinated by how they peek out of her collar and disappear into her hairline. He wants to know how much of her body is covered in them. He wants to know what they would feel like under his hands and lips.

They're halfway through the review sheet when Jim decides that they've played long enough and kisses her. She apparently agrees because she's kissing back and when Jim runs a couple fingers over the cool scales on the back of her neck he finds he's so hard it hurts. Her kisses are a playful challenge. There's a lot of force behind every movement she makes and she's daring Jim to push back. Well, that's fine by him. It's a sort of wrestling match and Jim's not really sure how he ends up on top (he has a sneaking suspicion she let him win).

On the first thrust into her, Jim's decided that this will be one of his top ten sexual encounters. Her body temperature is much cooler than that of a human's. She's lukewarm around his cock and it's fantastic. It's amazing how the hand sliding down his belly feels like a cool, damp cloth and how her fingertips on the back of his neck are like snowflakes. He can't imagine how she feels having his far too hot body on top of her, inside of her, holding her hips down.

It's the sounds she's making that drive Jim over the edge. She's all breathy gasps and whimpers and sighs of encouragement. She leans up and whispers dirty words in English and another language he's never heard into his ear. Then she licks his ear and the cool wet of her tongue makes him shiver. Jim comes with a small cry. She follows almost immediately with an ecstatic hiss.

Jim watches her get dressed and misses the sight of the scales on her tummy. He looks up at her and says, "You know, you could stay." He gets a kiss and a smirk in reply.

"What of your roommate, Jim?"

"Bones? He'd understand. We have a code." She chuckles, grabs her text book and makes her way to the door.

"What about my quiz tomorrow?" Jim leans against the wall in his sexiest pose.

She turns back and smiles. "I think we both know you'll do just fine."

"But what if I don't do well?" Jim pouts at her and gives her the puppy eyes, but apparently she's immune to them because she laughs, says "Goodnight, Jim" and is gone. As the door closes Jim realizes that the game is over and he's lost. He sits somewhat dazedly on his bed.

Ten minutes later Bones comes in.

"You know, Jim, I don't care if you bring people back to the room, but the least you can do is put your pants back on when you're done." Bones looks frustrated and tired.

"Bones, she used me," Jim says, sounding hurt.

"So what? You use people all the time."

"I know, but…this is… I don't like it, Bones."

"Well, now you know how everyone else feels. Would you please put some pants on?"


	3. Chapter 3

_Author's Notes:_ Oh ho! Chapter 3! This part is what started my love of Kirk/Pike.

There is no sex in this part! But there's implications like WOAH!

_Pairing:_ Kirk/OFC, Kirk Pike (sort of), Kirk/Spock (This part has Kirk/Pike...though it's only implied)

_Rating:_ M for sexual situations and language

_Disclaimer:_ I own nothing! Not a thing! Not even Pike's gift to Kirk! I am not making money off of this!

* * *

3. Jim learns that seminars are as important as regular classes, people are not always what they seem, and the different types of lube is something he should definitely look into.

Christopher Pike is not a professor, he's a seminar instructor. There is a difference, one that Jim just can't get Bones to understand. Jim likes seminars. He gets to choose which ones he goes to. Pike's seminars are usually pretty interesting. But then, Jim usually wants to go to them. He feels a bit bad that he's not really paying attention. He has a lot of respect for Pike and Pike deserves his attention… but who schedules a mandatory seminar about diplomatic relations on the most beautiful Saturday afternoon of the entire year? It's just stupid.

Twenty minutes into the presentation Jim has successfully zoned out. He's thinking about who he'd be more likely to go out with tonight. The girl sitting three rows in front of him? The boy sitting two seats to his left? Or both? Hm… Decisions. Of course, Pike picks that exact moment to ask a question and, of course, he calls on Jim, who is caught completely off guard. Bones is sliding down in his seat, there are a few giggles in the back, and Pike is wearing a strange smirk.

"Mr. Kirk, please see me in my office after the seminar is over," Pike says, smiling. "Now, you there, how would you greet a diplomat on a planet if you don't know the culture?"

Jim sighs. He can hear someone giggling in the row behind him and he's tempted to turn around and slug him. He won't. Not with Bones sitting next to him and Pike having already called him out once. This does not, however, keep him from zoning out again.

Pike's office is extremely comfortable and this comfort extends to Jim's chair, which may be the best chair ever made. Leather is a good thing. A very, very good thing. Pike is reclining behind his desk, an easy and kind smile on his face.

"I know you don't really need to have someone spoon-feed information to you, but when you attend a function that has several younger cadets also attending, you need to show some respect for the instructor."

"Yeah, I know. I'm sorry. I-"

"Of course," Pike grins, "you did have an excellent reason for not listening."

Jim gapes. "W-What?"

"That boy? He's delicious. You have very good taste, Jim."

"Um…Thank you…?"

Pike laughs as he stands up and walks over to a cabinet. "I know what you were thinking. Something to the effect of, 'God, what a pretty mouth?' You were thinking just how gorgeous he'd look beneath you, right, Jim?" He takes something out of the cabinet.

"Uh…Yeah…I guess I was…" Jim's not really sure how he's supposed to react to all this, so he settles on a truthful, if lame, answer.

"He's not what you think." Pike walks back to his desk and scribbles something on a piece of paper. "You won't be able to dominate him. He's not going to be submissive."

"No?" Jim smirks this time.

"No. So, here." He presents Jim with a small blue vial.

"What's this?" He takes the vial and carefully looks over it.

"A gift. The first time on bottom can be rough. It'll make it a little easier for you. It does other things, too, but I'll let you discover that for yourself." Pike sits back down looking self assured.

"What makes you so sure I'll use this with him?"

"He'll be in the student lounge in the B-Wing. I recommend the Thai place on 5th Street," Pike says and turns to his computer screen. Jim laughs and takes this to mean he's been dismissed.

Two weeks later, Jim finds himself back in Pike's office holding an empty blue vial, begging for more.


	4. Chapter 4

_Author's Notes:_ Why, hello, there Chapter 4! This is a rather short one. It's also an example of how I played with the word "banged."

There is no sex in this part! Only humor...and an evil alarm clock that may or may not actually be Bones.

_Pairing_: Kirk/OFC, Kirk/Pike (sort of), Kirk/Spock (There is no pairing for this part...unless it's Kirk/Evil!Alarm clock)

_Rating:_ M for sexual situations and language

_Disclaimer:_ I own nothing! Not a thing! I am not making money off of this.

* * *

4. Jim learns that being on time can actually prevent physical injury.

He's late, so incredibly, terrifyingly late. He's never been late! Well, at least not when it counts. And this counts, damn it! He's going to miss the most important exam of the entire year because Bones shut the fucking alarm clock off. He claims it was an accident. Jim doesn't believe him, but then Jim also thinks the alarm clock might be possessed.

He's got two minutes before the professor starts the test. He can make it in two minutes, right? Right? Because if he doesn't, then there will never be a James T. Kirk on any starship owned by the Federation. Ever. Oh, God, he can't believe this is happening. But he can make it. He's going to make it. He can see the room, the door is still open. Yes! Ha! Screw you, alarm clock!

CRASH! BANG! BOOM! DOOM!

Looking back on the situation, Jim thinks he should probably laugh about it. Bones certainly did. He'd laughed through the whole story. He laughed all the way through popping Jim's shoulder back in the socket and through arranging the sling on Jim's arm. He was still laughing when Jim wrote a formal apology to his professor for breaking his leg.

Who knew that kind of damage could be done from running down a hallway?

Well, at least the exam was rescheduled…


	5. Chapter 5

_Author's Note_: Welcome to Chapter 5. Please, enjoy your stay. (And my cheesey play on word meanings.)

There is no sex in this part! Only humor.

_Pairing_: Kirk/OFC, Kirk/Pike (sort of), Kirk/Spock (There is no pairing in this one. Only Kirk's Elbow/Sulu's face)

_Rating:_ M for sexual situations and language

_Disclaimer_: By now you should know that I own nothing and I'm not making money off of this. If you don't, then you haven't been paying attention.

* * *

5. Jim learns that sex and fencing are, in fact, not as similar as he thought they were.

When Sulu asks Jim if he'll spar with him, Jim happily agrees. Sometimes there just isn't anything else to do (if you don't count paperwork and Jim doesn't). Besides, Sulu has been teaching him how to fence. He can get some practice in before they both need to be back on the bridge.

Sulu is very skilled. He's been doing this since he was ten (apparently). Jim really isn't a match for him, but he's trying. (No, really, he's trying. He's trying to put off that damn paperwork.) In the few weeks since the start of their little lessons, Jim has learned quite a bit. Sulu believes it's his teaching ability. Jim believes it's the fact that fencing is like sex and he's very good at sex.

He noticed it during the first lesson. Like sex, fencing revolves around the same basic movements. The fencer's skill comes not only from his ability to master these basic moves, but to use them in new and unexpected ways. That's really how he managed to learn so much so quickly.

Today Sulu surprises him. He parries Jim's thrust easily, does some sort of half spin and has his foil pressed to Jim's throat as well as his right hand in a death grip. Jim reacts. (What else is he supposed to do?) He slams his elbow back, hard, into Sulu's chest. As he stumbles back Jim raises a fist and lands a firm punch.

Sulu doesn't have any hard feelings. He even laughs about it when he wakes up and McCoy explains everything to him. That, however, does not stop him from letting the good doctor convince the captain he's dead. The look on Jim's face is priceless.


	6. Chapter 6

_Author's Notes:_ And now, ladies and gentlemen, for the Plus One! Oh, plus 1, how I sweet and dirty you are. Anyway, this is it. I hope you enjoyed the 5 teachers Kirk banged and the one that banged him!

Sex is below. Again, like before, I do not consider this explicit, but you might. So be careful! If you've made it this far, you'll be fine.

_Pairing:_ Kirk/OFC, Kirk/Pike (sort of), Kirk/Spock (This part contains Kirk/Spock slash...which is my OTP...so you know.)

_Rating:_ M for sexual situations and language.

_Disclaimer:_ Seriously? Not mine. Never will be. If it was, Jim and Spock would do this more often.

* * *

6. Jim learns that he should really listen to his First Officer, but finds that the reasons not to are far more convincing.

Spock is pissed. Jim could hear hints of anger in his voice when they'd gotten back. He can feel it in the way Spock's fingers are digging (quite painfully) into the bruise on his hip. He winces. The Vulcan simply tightens his grip and thrust minutely harder just once.

"If you had listened to me when I was informing the landing party of the cultural differences between Humans and the Balitians, perhaps you would not have been thrown into a table," Spock says into Jim's ear.

"Yeah," he replies somewhat breathlessly, "perhaps."

Spock must not have liked that answer because he pulls out slowly and pushes back in just as slowly. Jim's about ready to start crying. It's been nearly a half hour of this slow, torturous fucking and it's driving him crazy. He knows he screwed up the mission, but he would prefer Spock beating the shit out him to this. He whimpers at another excruciatingly slow thrust.

"God, Spock, just fuck me," he whines as he begins to writhe restlessly.

"I do not believe you deserve it, Jim," Spock replies coolly.

"Please?" Oh, how Uhura would laugh at how pathetic her captain sounds.

"You must promise you will listen," Spock says having stopped all his movements.

"Yes! God, yes! I promise! I promise! Yes!" Jim shouts as he finally gets what he's been wanting since they got back to the ship.

He loves Spock's cock. It's exactly what he needs, what he always needs. He tells his partner so in breathy whispers. Spock might have smirked, but his face is buried in Jim's hair and there's no way to be sure. And, oh! This thrust is perfect! It's angled just right and it's going to hit – NO!

"Dammit! You did that on purpose!" Jim wails, panting, and pushing his hips back, shifting to get that perfect angle back.

"If you are referring to the fact that I am purposely avoiding your prostate, then yes, I did do that on purpose." Spock is out of breath and Jim finds a strange satisfaction in that.

"But I promised!" Jim gasps.

"I did not believe you."

"Oh, damn it! Come on, Spock! I'll listen next time. I swear. I promise. Just-" Jim is cut off by the searing, delicious, wonderful feeling of his prostate being thrust directly into. He dissolves into a moaning, panting, whining, incoherent mass of what might have once been a Starfleet captain. But Spock is right there with him, breathing heavily into his ear.

When it's over and they're both sticky and the room smells like sweat and semen, Jim is half asleep with an arm slung over Spock's waist.

"Jim, you must start listening to me." Vulcans really know how to ruin the afterglow.

"I will. Don't worry," he replies sleepily.

"I am serious. Your decision to consistently disregard the information I give you is highly illogical. There is no guarantee that Doctor McCoy or I will be able to assist you in a dire situation." If he didn't know better, he would say that Spock was worried about him.

"I promise." But as Jim drifts off to sleep he can't quite remember what he's supposed to be promising or why.


End file.
